Mom Supports Gaye Rights, Capitol Punishment

Thanks to Jake Porter of the George Phillies For President campaign, I have decided that I should make my stance on a couple of issues known to all.

I am fully in support of Gaye rights. I think Marvin has all kinds of rights, even though he's now a zombie thanks to my Campaign Manager and Hoodoo Master, Texino. In fact, when I win the White House, I fully intend to have entertainment provided by Marvin, as proof of my support for this important issue.

Needless to say, I also support Gaye marriage. I think Marvin should be able to get married to anyone he wants, and the fact that anyone would think otherwise just shows that many voters don't understand this important issue!

I also support capitol punishment. I think everyone in the capitol should be punished severely, since politicians are inherently evil (except me, of course). I don't have any preferences as to form of punishment, however, but I'm open to suggestions from voters.

See, even alleged supporters of other presidential candidates support Mom, since they come to me for help with very important issues which they haven't even shared with their own candidate! Thanks, Jake!